Tot - 1 year, 10 months, Fry - 2.5 months

Quiet Morning

The Tater Tot had a rough night last night. I know she's at the verge of potty training and really I should do more about it, but I really don't have enough hands to help her. I can't just drop what I'm doing/cleaning/changing/nursing/burping, etc., to run and help her on the potty. But she's becoming visibly upset when she pees in her diaper. And on more than one occasion, I've had to say to her, "You need to pee? Ok, pee in your diaper, Mommy's feeding Sissy and can't get up right now."
Horrible mommy. Really. Just awful.

I should just install a potty in every room of the house and just let her run around pants-less so she can just take care of it herself. She'll get it. Eventually. If not, we just bought a new rug scrubber.

Ohmygodthatthingisamazing!

And Spud is pretty amazing too for cleaning the living room/entryway. The amount of juice spills on that carpet was rid-iculous! Ugh!

Moving on...

Anyways, I'm up early, before everyone else again. I fed Small Fry at 6:30am and of course, once she's done, I'm too awake to go back to sleep because I know I'm just going to have to get up soon. So I grabbed a shower, and that was pretty drama free and not too time consuming, so I decided to *pamper* myself and put on some lotion. I rarely get a chance to lotion my (hopefully) shrinking tummy with special skin firming lotion (that must only work on the skinny people on the label), so I was feeling a little empowered.

What else can I pamper myself with? Is that a forgotten pore strip at the bottom of my makeup box?

(Yes, I have a box. Don't judge.)

I have clean pores. And painted toe nails. And exquisite eyeliner. I may have gone a little overboard for cleaning day that entails me wearing sweatpants (cut-off, no less).

But no one was sucking/climbing/hitting/peeing/pooping/ (or otherwise draining the life out of me) on my body, so I felt the need for a little pampering. Tater Tot is sleeping in due to her stressful peeing in the middle of the night (Sorry Mommy couldn't get here faster because Sissy was eating and Daddy was sleeping on the couch again. No no, honey, sweetie, don't worry! We're not getting a divorce... yet. Daddy just likes to snore and didn't want to wake (anger) Mommy. )

And Spud and Small Fry are snuggling in the bed. I hope he doesn't suffocate her in his sleep. Again. He has a bad habit of that.


So it's me and the cats and my coffee. Chilling at the dining room table. Waiting for the house to wake up. And I'm ok with being up early, for once.





Tater Tot's Vocabulary - 22 Months
Big
Carrot
Mimo
Rainbow
Bridge
Up
Sissy
Belly
Toes
Nose
Eyes
Eat
Bird
Ears
Bite
Hit
Pee
Poo
Buttcrack
Butt
Nice
Hair
Shirt
Fork
Bib
Cheese
Down
Mama/Mommy
Dada/Daddy
Booster
Seat
Itsy
Juice
Lulu (Lucas)
Pants
Drink
Fix
Alexa
Shoes
Light
Apple
Paci (Sissy Paci/Baba)
Boots
Bucket
Pat
Uncle
Aunt
Treat
Blanket
Snack
Fish
Messy
Hat
Silly
Chair
Sit
Me
No
Mm-hmm
Book
Toys
Outside
Neck(lace)
Leg
Boo-boo
Armpit
Arm
Elbow
Shake
Turn
Paint
Duck
Soap
Towel
Bath
Brush (Hair/Teeth)
More
Dias (10)
Nueve (9)
Ocho (8)
Ses (6)
Cinqo (5)
Quatro (4)
Dos (2)
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Blue
Head
Diaper
Change
Horse
Poof-poof
Hands
Pyramid
Neck
Dress
Wet
Push
Pull
Sammy
Gibby
Paper
House
Church
Josh
Dede
Destiny
Book
Brooke
Scout
Battery
Race
Remote
Tights
Bug
Elmo
Abby
Oscar
Octopus
Isa
Tico
Diego
Alicia
Whoa-whoa (Dog)
Turtle
Truck
Pink
Purple
Cat
Stick
Fish
Bird
Purse
Shoes
Socks
Jacket
Office
Backpack
Map
Hot dog
Nom-noms (food)
Box

And I'm sure there's plenty more! 50% have developed over the last few weeks, I'd say.

144 words!



Small Fry's achievements:
Um... she coos. She manages to poop through an outfit at least once a day. She loves the fan and the sound of the dryer. She hates the car. Sissa's voice pierces through her soul. She smiles at Daddy. She quiets with Mommy. It's getting better... :-)

Tot - 22 Months, Fry - 12 Weeks

I'd rather have no help than bad help.


First, watch this video of a 3 year old being patted down by TSA and violently throwing a fit in her mother's arms.


The cameraman? The father of the 3 year old girl. I bet you any money that after he was recording for 17 seconds, the wife got frustrated with him standing there, holding his cell phone in the air, and said, (through gritted teeth) "So help me, if you don't get over here and help me with this screaming child in the middle of the airport, I will take that cell phone and beat you with it!"

The point is not about TSA and the new regulations (although, yeah... it's a concern). Today's post is about actively participating in parenting. Helping, instead of standing by. Anticipating the needs of someone frazzled and worn thin. Pretending you know what the hell you're doing, even when you don't.

Unfortunately, this is a common argument in this household.

The division of work is heavy on both sides and weighs both of us down to a breaking point by the end of the day. There don't seem to be many solutions other than to cry, yell, and run when you can.

Kidding.

Hopefully soon the babies will even out a little bit and one won't need me quite so much all the time (seriously. Nursing every five minutes. No joke.)

Until then, we'll try to help each other and not let it build up so much! But if I was that mother in the video, I would have lost it right around the time that a-hole pulled out his phone instead of offering his hand.

Tot- 22 Months, Fry - 11 weeks

I just tried to capitalize the number two. That's right. A 2.

My mind is completely gone. Last night I completely lost it over a post on notalwaysright.com and started laughing hysterically until I was crying. I tried to find the post again to post it, but I can't find it right now. I'll summarize. The website is about stupid customers that are "not always right."

Customer asks for help with a cougar problem to a worker at a sporting goods store.

"You should get some bear spray to help detract cougars." - Employee
"Nah, that'll just piss them off. What are those?" - Customer
"Those are machetes, sir." - Employee
"Yeah! That's what we need! Machetes! We'll fight the cougars off with machetes. Forget the bear spray, that'll just piss them off."




HAHAAAAAAA! I laughed so hard, I had tears running down my face, black streaks of mascara on my cheeks, a jiggling baby in my arms, and a completely confused husband. I've lost it. I remember being at this point with Tater Tot. We were sleep deprived nutballs around this time and got really REALLY goofy.


Ok...haha... whew... sigh... breathe, ok. Back to what I was really going to write about. Our day. Life with two under two.

4:45am Wake up with Fry. Nurse. Fall asleep together.

6:45am Wake up with Fry. Nurse. Gently pat her back to sleep with Spud.

7:20am Mommy time! Make coffee, take a bath.

7:40am Wake Spud and he gets ready for work. Do makeup, get dressed.

8:00am Wake Fry and change diaper, outfit.

8:15am Wake Tot. Change, speak to Elmo, get dressed, play, threaten with bodily harm unless she comes with me downstairs for breakfast.

9:00am Sesame Street for Tot in highchair with breakfast. Mama and Fry nurse again.

9:45am AIS. Ass In Seat. Everybody's ass has to be in a seat in the car by this time.

10am Storytime with friends! Sing dance. Holy crap do NOT get lost in the library again! They will not feed you if I leave you here over night.

11am Leave storytime. Are you kidding me? Get in your seat. Mommy is very upset with you. Diaper changes.

11:05am Arrive home with a screaming infant and a running toddler. Nurse. Dora. Goldfish crackers. Peace.

11:06am Juice spills.

11:07am DO NOT HIT SISSY!

12pm Lunch! Sometimes, while still feeding Small Fry. That's a talent.

12:30pm Clean up lunch. Cuddle on couch. Pick up-PICK UP YOUR JUICE! Make a bottle and set it on the stairs, ready for naptime. Clean up toys. Put away. Clean up toys again.

1pm NAPTIME! All is right with the world. Change diapers and put babies to bed. Load dishwasher. Finish laundry. Cuddle up with baby and rest.

1:30pm Nurse. Nurse. Nurse some more. Computer time. Paperwork. All in bed with baby.

2:30pm Cant. Keep. My. Eyes. Open......zzzzzz

4:00pm Fry and I wake up and nurse. Sometime between now and when Daddy comes home, Tot wakes up and starts babbling in her crib. Sometimes she asks for Josh. Or talks to Elmo.

4:30pm Spud officially off work. He gets Tot while Fry and I finish nursing. Change diapers. Up. Awake. Snacks. Juice.

5:00pm Dinner preparations. Either Spud or Mama make dinner - most often Spud.

6:00pm Dinner. PICK UP YOUR JUICE!

6:10pm Time out chair. Crying ensues. Sissy gets upset and needs to nurse again.

6:45pm Clean up. Cuddle time. Play time. Put away laundry. Load dishwasher.

7:30pm BATHTIME! (Paint? Duck? Yes Tot, you can paint the rubber duckie with watercolors while we bathe you. Sure) Daddy's in charge of bath time. I love it. I go get a bottle ready, pick out pj's, assemble her bed (because Spud forgets and leaves a mess after naptime), and cleans the upstairs.

7:45pm Nighttime diaper. Lotion. Vicks. Brush hair. Pajamas. Brush teeth. Medicine. Storybook. Hugs and kisses for Mommy, Daddy, and Sissy.

8pm Lights out for Tot. Bathtime for Fry. Mommy/baby warm bath together.

8:30pm Pjs for the little pee pee.

9pm Nurse.

11pm Nurse. Drift off to sleep.

12am I finally get to sleep. Maybe.